SHELL SHOCKED - THE TRUTH

Let's face it its incredible - its edible - it’s the Egg. Its breakfast, it's dessert, its leavening, it’s a wash, it’s a soufflé. It's an omelet, scrambled, poached, dropped in soup, fried, hard boiled, deviled, soft boiled, a frittata, pickled, over easy, sunny side up, it’s a mousse, it's a quiche, don’t be afraid to unleash- all the possibilities that are the egg . It is the most versatile food stuff in the world. It has been beaten, frothed, meringued, coddled , baked , and decorated. Some folks bury them in the ground for 100 years.(WTF ? ) It's an icon for religions, a staple for all kitchens, and acceptable food for vegans (some). Its oval , a sign of life, self protected, sometimes neglected, often rejected. Made to wait, left to its own fate, travels in a crate, don’t forget to refrigerate. Billions are eaten every year. Amateurs cook them without fear, some people add them to their beer. They can be runny, they can be funny, they can be tight, and they can be white ( but not all the time). How much more can I ramble off here ? Get some eggs and cook them, book them, nook them and head on down the road with them .
Egg-citing Facts
As a kid in Brooklyn we wandered the streets on Halloween eve and "egged" unsuspecting passersby, buses and cars. If we rang your bell to trick or treat, and your treats sucked you were getting it. If you liked a girl it was considered sign of affection to "egg" her house to profess your admiration. If you got caught by her ham handed, pot bellied, mustachioed, Italian father ( or mother) it would be unlikely you would be courting her on the stoop any time soon. If left untreated on some cars overnight the cracked egg would remove the paint.
The classic chefs white toque is the tall hat worn in many kitchens. The 101 folds in the toque is said to signify the many ways to cook an egg.
Sold by the dozen ? Who's idea was that?
Chicken eggs are the most widely used but technically all eggs are edible. Duck and goose eggs are available in some areas. Quail eggs are considered a delicacy, and are shelved in some gourmet and ethnic stores. Various types of exotic eggs are available for a price.
The classic "century egg" or 100 year egg is a Chinese tradition born out of the need to preserve the egg. It is coated in ash, lime, salt ,clay and straw and "buried" for weeks to months. The result is a creamy dark green yolk that reeks of Sulphur and Ammonia, and a jelly like white that now has turned a dark brown or black. According to some, the century egg has over five centuries of history behind its production. Its discovery, though not verifiable, was said to have occurred during the Ming Dynasty 600 years ago in Hunan, when a home owner discovered duck eggs in a shallow pool of slaked lime that was used for mortar during construction of his home 2 months before. Upon tasting the eggs he set out to produce more, this time with the addition of salt to improve this taste, thus resulting in the present recipe of the century egg.
Side note : In 1998 I traveled to Brazil for work. I took Connecticut Limo from Danbury to JFK. At one of the stops two old Asian women boarded and sat on the bench seat next to me. The older one ( she was about 119) whips out this little canvas bag and immediately the bus fills with this rancid odor. It was like a disemboweled goat baking in 100 degree weather . I watch in horror as she unwraps these cocoon like ovums from their mud packed casings. The eggs were an opaque black and the real treat began when she and her little sister (104) began chowing down on these fowl ( pun intentional ) puss like wavos. It was a long ride. The 2 hour bus ride to New York seemed longer that the 14 plus hour flight to Sao Paulo. It was Egg- stremely nauseating. I had a bag of Fritos, and a Dr. Pepper.
Egg cartons have a secret code of DaVinci like proportions. There are three sets of numbers. The P or plant number indicates the where they were packed. The second one to three digit number is the packed on date. It is the Julian date. January first is 001- December 31 is 365.Using this calendar you can see how long ago your eggs were washed, packed and shipped. Then there is usually a sell by date.
Egg size is rated is usually six sizes, as the chart below indicates:

Modern Sizes (USA)
Size
Mass per egg
Cooking Yield (Volume)[3]
Jumbo
Greater than 2.5 oz. or 71 g
Very Large or Extra-Large (XL)
Greater than 2.25 oz. or 64 g
56 ml(4tbsp)
Large (L)
Greater than 2 oz. or 57 g
46 ml (3.25 tbsp)
Medium (M)
Greater than 1.75 oz. or 50 g
43 ml (3 tbsp)
Small (S)
Greater than 1.5 oz. or 43 g
Peewee
Greater than 1.25 oz. or 35 g

I have never seen a Peewee egg.
Many egg producers are now using laser technology to place the expiration date right on the shell.
Jumbo and Extra large eggs are most likely to contain double yolks. It like eating the Doublemint Twins.
What is the deal with brown eggs ? Well there is one huge difference between brown eggs and white eggs. Brown eggs are brown and white eggs are white.
That is all. White chickens have white feathers and earlobes and lay white eggs. Red and brown chickens lay brown eggs. It all in the earlobe, the tell tale color of the earlobe will determine the color of the egg.
The US produces 10% of the worlds egg product.
If you have trouble remembering which eggs have been hardboiled, just spin them. A raw egg will wobble, a cooked egg spins effortlessly.
Eggs have been used in fortune telling ceremonies and matchmaking practices in many cultures for years. Eggs are also thought to provide a link to our dearly departed.
Side Note: I had my best egg meal about six years ago at a little café on Block Island. We went to the island for a friend's wedding and stopped into this place on Sunday morning. The eggs were creamy and sweet and there was something very different about them. When I inquired was informed that they were laid that morning. Truly a difference.




Vegetable Frittata
I start this in a Teflon pan and go directly into the oven to finish. All ingredients are in the frittata. A great one dish meal, addition to a buffet , or a brunch item.

8 large eggs-
Asparagus or Broccoli - 1 cup parboiled and chopped
1 small onion thinly sliced and sautéed until soft
1/2 cup mushrooms sliced
1 Jalapeno pepper minced sautéed with the onion
2 cloves minced garlic sautéed with the onion
2 tbsp butter
1/4 cup extra sharp cheddar cheese
1/4 cup pepper jack cheese
Nutmeg- salt and pepper to taste
Sauté onion in half the butter, for 4-5 minutes or until soft. Add the jalapeno and the garlic at 3 minutes. Beat the eggs in a large stainless steel bowl season with salt and pepper. Season with fresh or ground nutmeg to taste. Assure a smooth consistent mixture with no hint of puddles of egg white or globs of yolk. In a twelve inch Teflon pan heat the butter on medium heat until slightly brown. Add the egg mixture and keep on heat for 3-5 minutes until bottom begins cook. Add vegetables assuring all veggies are spread out within the pan. Top with cheeses and reduce heat to medium low. At this point you may cover and keep pan on the stovetop or place into a 325 degree oven. At 15 minutes check for doneness. Allow the frittata to cool and but serve warm. Serve with toasted baguette, English muffins, or rye toast. Consider a garnish of fresh dill and some melon on the plate to add sweetness.

Variations : Spinach- Feta -Roasted Red Pepper, Red and Green Bell Peppers and pre-cooked Potatoes, Corn and Black Beans.

I close with this question ……… Are you Happy ????????


No, Mad HMMMMMM

Great Food Quotes

Welcome to the Church of the Holy Cabbage. Lettuce pray. ~Author Unknown

Never work before breakfast; if you have to work before breakfast, eat your breakfast first. ~Josh Billings

A nickel will get you on the subway, but garlic will get you a seat. ~Old New York Proverb

Condensed milk is wonderful. I don't see how they can get a cow to sit down on those little cans. ~Fred Allen

Fish, to taste right, must swim three times - in water, in butter, and in wine. ~Polish Proverb

Garlic Bread _ Come On ??? !!!~

Garlic Bread - Come on …. Let's face it it's wonderfully simple and really Freaking good. I would like contemplate the varying degrees of Garlic Bread. First the DON'TS - that thing they sell in the fake aluminum foil bag in the supermarket is out of the question. Do not look at it - do not consider it - and please do not buy it. Garlic Spread- Hydrogenated monkey, juice if you eat this stuff you will urinate mercury. Don’t do it … Chopped Jarred garlic has its place - not on your bread though. Pre- peeled jars of garlic in the produce section, also have some redeeming factors- IF YOU HAVE NO FINGERS.

Now Bread- It is a true perishable - so get it fresh, a crusty semolina- a long French loaf, pick up anything baked that day. If you buy too much freeze it in the bag that day. It will be good for a couple of weeks. Get some butter, that’s real that’s the deal… Purchase lightly salted butter. You may not use it all that day so freeze the remainder. Pick up some fresh organic garlic. It will be a few cents more but it's worth it.
What about olive oil ? ( not the boney chick from Popeye) A good quality oil can be an addition or a substitution . Wrap the bread in some foil - sprinkle a few drops of water over the loaf. Wrap tightly and bake for about 10 minutes at 350. This will steam and heat the bread and get it back to a fresh baked state. After that follow the recipe below and you will be a happy camper. Please do not believe the hype about bad breath, or gas, garlic is a wonderful healthy addition to anything. It will cleanse you and has great medicinal purposes. I have a good friend from Pakistan who swear by 4 cloves raw daily, he chews them prior to breakfast. Now the 4 raw clove thing may be a bit extreme, but there is a huge market for Garlic supplements. So there must be something to it.

Really Good Garlic Bread

1 loaf of good quality Italian or French bread- Heat slightly in foil at 350 ( sprinkle with a few drops of water) about 8-10 minutes. Retain foil
1 Head Organic Garlic 6-8 cloves- thinly sliced not minced
1/4lb lightly salted butter- softened
2 Tablespoons olive oil
Crushed red pepper flakes
Goya brand Adobo seasoning to taste

After heating bread- split loaf long ways - keep halves attached. Slather liberally with butter. Broil on middle shelf for 2 minutes. Watch Carefully do not burn, it may take your over 1 minute .
Heat small sauté pan with oil. Lightly sweat garlic until edges become light brown. Take pan of heat right away. Remove bread from oven and using a large spoon spread cooked garlic onto both sides of bread. Season with red pepper flakes and Adobo. Rewrap in foil and heat for 3-5 minutes. Top with fresh chopped parsely.

Serve with favorite pasta dish.

Closing Thoughts Cook With Garlic- Bake Bread from Scratch - Stuff a portabella mushroom for Pete's Sake ( who the hell is Pete any way?). A Shorty but goodie.

Peace out Peeps TFN

THE MEAL - A OVERVIEW

I must begin by saying I have left everyone in a bit of a lurch for these past few weeks and I am sorry. And I say I am sorry because I honestly have a lot of trouble with the word apploligize ( the first try) appoligize ( number two) appologize ( still wrong all from memory no spell check). So I will not even honor this mental block, brain fart, spell check tart of a word with its correct spelling. So the bottom line is I have neglected you my loyal peeps for too long. And I apppppp…. I am sorry.
I spoke through proxy to the infamous UD yesterday and he was eagerly waiting and salivating for the next TFN entry. I explained I had no real fodder for the blog. No great meals, no blockbuster recipes, no great resturant reviews( another mental block mis- spelling spell, Imagine a guy in the food service industry for 17 plus years that can't spell resturant ) . UD says Blog about Marilyn's cookbook.( which will come in a later issue. So then I sit down and begin to ponder the crux of the meal itself. Not the content, not the venue, not the cost, or the dessert but the concept of the meal itself. The conversation, the camaraderie(which I can spell), the ritual of breaking bread. The ability to be at rest with those you care about and take in nourishment. A life sustaining effort, both on a physical and emotional plane.
I mention this because I had a wonderful meal with my 70+ year old neighbor, Marilyn yesterday. It was Mother's Day, and we were both home alone. My Mom has been gone for a great while and Marilyn's daughter is far away. So it was a healing and bonding surrogate experience for both of us. I was originally scheduled to take her to dinner after we went to church together on Saturday night. But a surprise visit from my man LUMPY for volunteer car repair ran into the evening hours and I had to cancel. So I get up Sunday morning and call her… she says " I have some really nice hamburger meat, how about we just eat here"
Now let me explain Marilyn. She was born the oldest of 14, in Colby Wisconsin. A farm girl who could drive the tractor, or birth a calf, or bake a wonderful loaf of bread from scratch. She has described a great visual of her Dad hanging onto the side of the tractor loaded with too much hay to offset the load from spilling over her dad hangs onto one side saying " Go Blondie Go… whatever happens don' t stop." Marilyn is also a smart business woman and a true spiritual soul. We feel blessed to count Marilyn as part of our family. We realized last year that fate and divine intervention had put us across from Marilyn and Jim to nurture both families. I would be remiss to mention that Jim is no longer with us and plants a huge void in our hearts every day. However during lunch the front door closed by itself as it grew a little colder which I attributed to Jim watching over us.
So Marilyn and I have a great Mother's Day Bruncheon ( my word ). Fresh cooked hand formed burgers on the grill - 93/7 ground beef, some potato salad, beans, and a great salad with blueberries. Now the highlight of the meal was the conversation. Marilyn told some stories about business, camping, traveling and family that took us in all different directions. I countered with comparable anecdotes. We recognized some very similar tales that made me realize we experienced some shared circumstances . Useless purchases of unused trailers and campers that although well intentioned were bad decisions.
Marilyn had a great memory of renting a camper and driving to Wisconsin to see her family. ( Because Jim always had to make an entrance) They rent the RV from a guy in Gainesville, they pick it up in a field behind a house where there are other campers. They pay the guy a couple thousand dollars cash, and he says drop it off here when you are done, and I will check it out and get back to you if there are any issues. They have Marilyn's daughter, her husband and two grand kids with them. They drive the camper without incident to Wisconsin. Jim makes his entrance and they head back home. On the way back the RV develops an equipment issue. They stop at an RV dealer in Minneapolis to get the part installed and make their way home. They make it back to Virginia in one piece and launch the grand kids home. The RV gets dropped off and they recommend this RV rental guy to a friend a few months later. They get a call from the Virginia State Police and are informed the Winnebago they drove to Wisconsin was stolen. The catch is the unit was stolen from the same dealer in Minnesota that they stopped at to get the part fixed. The whole family could have landed in a Minnesota jail if the dealer ran the VIN number. A great story on all levels. Shared over an impromptu meal shared by two souls brought together by fate or luck or serendipity. ( look it up ).
So no major recipes or big food revelations. But just an opportunity to speak to the human nature, spirituality and bonding of the MEAL . A meal , the breaking of bread, the staff of life which keeps us grounded to the importance of the little things.
I spoke to Marilyn about the publishing of this blog, and asked if she was ok with it. I thanked her for the company, and the meal. Marilyn says " spending time with you was like being with the son that I never had". I tell Marilyn " you are like the Mom that I no longer have "
The MEAL ….. sometimes - it's not about the food.
I thank you all for your support. My heart is with all of you.
Thanks for the attention- please don’t lose interest . I will keep you fed.

TFN

thanks for watching - TFN - always wandering